The Deal With Showing Rather Than Telling

Posted By Karen on December 19, 2009

Yes, I know, everyone’s heard this a hundred times at least: you must show, not tell. Well, for those who are new to the writing world, what exactly does telling and showing mean?

Okay, let’s take an example of telling:

April walked around in a daze. She felt awful. Her husband left her with two little ones. She cried and cried. She felt overwhelmed, but kept doing the things she had to do. It seemed as if her soul ached. She begged for God’s help. She felt like screaming.

Example of showing:

He wasn’t supposed to leave; we promised to stay married forever. April pulled the sheets from her bed and threw them to the floor. Doing the chores and taking care of the kids helped her hold on. She felt as if she was outside of herself…she had to hold on. How could he leave? Tears trickled down her cheeks. She bent forward with her head in her hands. Please, God, bring him home…please…please help me. Sobbing softly in her hands her body began to tremble; then the tears gushed forth. An indescribable ache took hold – in the very depths of her soul – an ache in a place never felt before. A tortured scream crept up into her throat, ready to burst out. She fell to her knees and buried her face in the mattress. Grabbing a pillow, she pulled it over her head. A blood-curdling scream issued forth.

So, that’s the difference. I made the telling example very basic so you could easily see how they differ. Showing lets the reader feel the protagonist’s pain, or joy, or excitement. It creates a connection and prompts the reader to continue reading. Sometimes it helps to draw from experiences to get the feeling and words you’re going for. You can also use tv or movies; watch and study scenes that depict the experience you need to convey. Then, write what you’ve seen. 

You can also play act the scene yourself. If your character needs to demonstrate anger, think how you would react and play it out. Pay attention to your actions, movements, look. You can use this to show the reader rather than tell.

Until next time,

Karen

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About the author

Karen

Karen is a published author, writer-for-hire, and freelance writer. She is the creator and manager of VBT - Writers on the Move; co-moderator of a children's writing critique group; a reviewer multiple sites, and an acquisitions editor intern with 4RV Publishing. Her books are: Day's End Lullaby (a children's rhyming bedtime picture book), The Self-Publisher's Guide (an ebook that includes information on writing, publishing options, marketing and promotional strategies, and more), Writing, Publishing, and Marketing - You Can Do It! (a 34 page ebook that offers guidance and tips on writing, publishing, and marketing with useful tools and examples), and Writing for Children One Step at a time (a 100+ page e-book offering writing and marketing information, tips and resources). And, Karen has a children's fantasy chapter book in contract with 4RV Publishing. Be sure to sign up (subscribe) for our FREE monthly newsletter.

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